Tuesday, November 29, 2011

The male-half

 Ok, so now that I'm caught up, I'd like to take a minute to tell you about my boyfriend.  Not in a disgusting lovey-dovey way (because even though I could, you don't want to read it), just more of an appreciative way.  See, he's the only person in this whole mess that hasn't laughed at me or tell me I was going to die up here (I already knew that, I didn't need everyone telling me).  He is from Minnesota (insert obligatory "Go Twins!" here because he loves baseball and doesn't give a damn if you think they suck - he's no fairweather fan) so he's been around this winter thing many times.  In fact, mid-west winters may be some of the worst in the US so I trust his judgement.  Mostly because I have none of my own.  I stand there looking lost and confused 95% of the time.  Add in cold and I am lost 150% of the time. Yes, I am perfectly aware that you can't have 150% of the time, it's called a hyperbole and I use them for dramatic effect.  Or as my mom would say, because I am a drama queen.  I am not a drama queen, I just am very expressive of my feelings. 

Anyway, back to the topic at hand.  I figured I would be proactive before I got up here, so I went online shopping for a winter coat. After about 3 days I decided I was hopelessly lost and asked said-named-bf to help me.  He knew exactly what I should get, a jacket with a removable fleece shell.  He even picked out the color because clearly I was on brain overload at the time and was unable to think for myself.

As soon as I got here, he also informed me I needed a flashlight, an emergency blanket, some kitty litter and some toilet paper. Someone else told me, I think his dad, that I needed a metal cup. Here is about how our conversation went:

"What's the kitty litter for?"
"So when you get stuck in the snow you can get out.  Put some under your tires and it gives some traction."

Refer to "Part 4" to see how well I heeded this advice.  More on this later...

"What is the cup for?"
"Because you have to melt the snow first before you drink it because if you just eat it, your body somethingsomethingsomthing."

I don't remember but I got the drift.

"What's the flashlight for"
"When it gets dark."

That should have been obvious but again, lost and confused 150% of the time when it comes to this subject. 

Well, I knew what the TP and blanket were for so I stopped the stupid questions.  At least for that day.  But since then I have literally turned to him for everything.  I mean, my mother is also a Floridian who thinks anything below 70 is freezing cold and my dad has lived in Florida since around 1970.  Clearly I was not getting any practical help from either of them.  So from which snow cleets should I get to do I really need those $16 wool socks that lady sold me? I asked the bf.  He's been helpful and wonderful and I wouldn't have gotten this far without him. But then came the day I got stuck on the ice.  He's not in Alaska at the moment, so I could only recount my story afterwards.

Him: "You used salt?"
Me: "Yeah, the black stuff in the barrels on base.  That's what they told me to use and it worked!"
"Why didn't you use kitty litter?"
"I didn't have any"
"I told you to get some."
"Yeah, but the salt totally worked just fine and now I have a whole bag in my car so I'm good to go."
"Babe, salt is going to corrode your car.  And it doesn't work when it gets really cold out.  You should put some kitty litter in your car."
"Yeah, but the salt..."
"I know what I'm talking about here"

This went on for a few more minutes before one of us changed the subject.  Honestly, who wants to fight about kitty litter?  Not me.

Which is why I now have some in my car.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Part 4 - The storm

Bering Sea storms are common in the winter.  It’s a part of living in the region.  But forecasters were saying this storm was going to be bad.  It was still too early in the season they said, and that was why this one was going to be so bad.  So bad in fact, some coastal regions of Western Alaska were being evacuated because of storm surge.  I was mentally prepared for my job to get more difficult, maybe some distress calls, some difficulty communicating, but I never thought about what would happen when that storm hit Kodiak.  At first, it just was snowing.  And it kept snowing for days.  I had to go shovel it a couple of times, but nothing we did could keep up.  It just kept coming down.  Plows couldn’t keep up, and the piles that they had cleared from the roads were much taller than I was.  We had maybe a foot a snow fall in the first few days.  Not much by anyone else’s standards, but then the wind hit.

50 mile per hour winds.  This was a hurricane in Alaska.  I had been warned these winds would get bad, but what I wasn't expecting was for them to blow all the snow away overnight.  Drifts of snow that were much higher, it was all just gone.  And it was in the teens.  Even the pilots wouldn’t fly in this weather.  And if there’s one thing I’ve learned about Coast Guard pilots is those people are crazy.  So if they refuse to go out, I know it must be bad.  But it got sunny again, and warmed up a few degrees and I thought the worst was over.  No, apparently that was just a break in the storm.

Then it snowed for days a second time.  Not so much wind this time, so it wasn’t so bad.  It was in the high twenties, so it would have been a nice time to go play in the snow, only I was working.  Of course. Then I came home after a long weekend and I saw what I knew would be bad.  My car’s thermometer said it was 34 degrees out.  This lesson I did learn in Cape May.  Snow melts then refreezes into ice.  Never in my life did I pray that it would get colder, and fast.  Before this got worse.  But pray I did. 

The next day, it was sunny and in the low twenties.  Sure enough, I was right. Ice everywhere.  I had yet to find a pair of ice cleats in my size so I was just going to have learn to navigate this stuff the hard way.  Sometime around noon, I realized I was starving and I decided to brave the roads and go get some sushi.  This should have been a simple task.  Only as soon as I tried to back out of my parking spot, I realized I was not going anywhere anytime soon.  I was stuck.  I got out, no snow behind me keeping me in, so I kept looking.  Sure enough, my front tires were sitting on ice.  And I have a front-wheel drive only vehicle.   After about 45 minutes of trying to get my car to move, I knew I was truly stuck and I needed some help.  Thank God for salt and being stuck on a CG base because I was out in no time.

Only I forgot the sushi place was closed on Monday.  So I settled for pho and pad thai instead.  I now also have ice and a small shovel in my car.  You know, just in case.  And it was a good thing too, because the next day we had white out conditions and it was 4 degrees, wind chill of -25.  But I wasn’t dumb enough to go out in this.  I knew one thing for sure: the snow was kicking my Florida ass.

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Enjoy stuffing your face with turkey. I have to work. In the snow. Yep, my first white holiday. Woohoo!

My first 10 weeks, part 3 - snow


It's November 1st.  I had just gotten qualified as a watchstander.  I had gone into work for a short day.  Imagine my surprise when I look at the security cameras (there are no windows) and see snow!  Real, fluffy snow!  When I leave, it's stopped but over everything is an inch thick blanket of untouched lovely snow.  I could hardly contain my excitement.  I drove back to base as fast as I dared.  Once I got back, I parked, threw open the door and just started some odd combination of dancing and kicking snow up off the ground.  I made a snowball.  I threw handfuls in the air.  SNOW!  This was FUN!
 
Seeing as how I had been up for about 36 hours at that point, I decided I would sleep first, then go play.  I was very surprised when I woke up and saw that this lovely white fluffy was now all brown and dirty.  The plow had cleared it all away!  No more playing in the snow today, but I knew there would be more days to come.  I also needed snow boots, so I took care of that the next day.
 
Then it happened.  Lots of snow.  And by lots I mean 3 inches.  And I had to drive to work in it while it was still coming down.  Alright, it was now or never.  My car was covered in snow though.  But I had my handy dandy broom ice scraper thing so I knew it was going to be ok!
 
Note to self: wipe the snow off the door first or a giant pile of it will fall in your car.
 
But I got the snow off and was off to work.  I drove slow, I was doing good.  This snow thing wasn't all that bad.
 
Second note to self: your car does not turn as well in the snow.
 
That should have been obvious looking back, but it wasn't.
 
I hit a snow bank.
 
Clearly I am ok because I'm still here.  I didn't even damage my car.  But I learned a very important lesson.
 
I also learned that when a car drives in the snow, it compresses it and makes ice.
 
Ice is slippery.
 
I fell on my ass.
 
For those of you keeping track: Snow 3, Amanda 0.  And on its way was what forecasters had been calling "the storm of the century."


Wednesday, November 23, 2011

My first 10 weeks, part 2 – snow gear


So a week or so after I got here, we got the first frost of the year.  And needless to say I was totally unprepared.  After thawing out my car by just turning it on and letting it run, I got to work.  And I explained to those around me that HOLY COW ITS FROSTY OUT THERE OH MY GOD WHAT DO I DO WHAT DO I DO WHAT DO I DO?!!?!?  After the laughter stopped, we decided I needed 3 things:
1: An ice scrapper.  Not a little one, but a big one. 
2: Get the windshield wiper fluid that defrosts your windows.
3: Waterproof shoes.  Because my Florida tennis shoes that were mess on top were not going to cut it.

With my list, I go out into town.  I first stop at the sporting goods store.  I had been in there before, and I knew they had shoes.  So after trying on a few pairs, I settle on a nice pair of hiking boots.  Because, well, I want to go hiking too.  So I get some that are sturdy, cover my ankle, and are waterproof.  I am set to go.  Until she asks me, “Are you sure you don’t want to try these on with wool socks to make sure they fit right?”

Wool socks?  No one mentioned wool socks

“….*blank stare* No one told you about wool socks?  Cotton just won’t do up here.  Those are no good in winter.  Here, try these.”

Um, ok.  A $16 pair of socks.  I’m convinced she’s  just trying to get me to buy more but I comply anyway because I already feel stupid.  So, $120 later, I am on my way to the auto store in search for my other two items.

When I walk in, I ask the lady where I can find ice scrappers and windshield wiping fluid.  She says that they don’t have them out, it’s too early in the year.  But there have already been morning with frost, so I am convinced this lady is crazy.  I NEED this stuff, why couldn’t she see that?  Fortunately, the have what I need, just not on display.  Someone offers to get one for me.  They ask what size ice scrapper I need.  “One of the big ones with the brush on the end for snow,” I say, confident in my answer.  That’s what I had been told to ask for, so I know its going to get me what I need. 

Now, before I explain this last bit, let me first tell you my experience with ice scrappers.  My mother had one from one year her car got covered in frost and some passerby took pity on her and gave her one.  It is smaller than my dad’s iPhone , but I’ve grown up seeing it and I think this is a normal size.  I’m thinking a big one is maybe 8 inches long.  Enough for the handle in-between.  Imagine my surprise when the stock guy pulls out this 24 inch long thing with a broom on one end.  “This is the small size, but you don’t want this.  Hold on, I’ll get a bigger one.”

What.The.Hell.

“Here, this is the medium size one.  Its maybe 30 inches long, but we have one that’s 36 inches and has a telescoping handle!”  Um, yeah, my car isn’t that big.  I think the medium one will be just fine. “Are you sure?” Yep.  I grab this….broom thing and some anti-frost windshield stuff and hit the checkout.  The lady is pleased I have found what I have asked about.  This stop is much cheaper, only about $20.  I go to leave, but then I turn around, remembering I don’t know how to use said broom thing.  The lady laughs at me (I’ve gotten used to it at this point) and she explains I use the brush to sweep the snow away and the other end to scrape the ice.  I am still dumbfounded.  But the lady says that people here are friendly and will notice that I am clueless and will help me figure it all out when it snows.  Feeling confident in my new found snow gear, I leave the store and head back to base.  I just knew that with these three things, I could handle anything Kodiak threw at me.  I was ready.

I thought.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

My first 10 weeks in Kodiak - part 1

Just to get everyone caught up, I thought I would do a little recap as to what my first 10 weeks in Kodiak have been like.  When I first got here, it was in the 50’s and raining.  I was freezing and I knew instantly I was going to die.  DIE.  I was going to freeze to death in the next two weeks.  I mean, the first stage of freezing to death sucks because your limbs are so cold.  But then the second stage comes and blood stops flowing there and you just feel…peaceful. You stop being cold.  Then eventually you just fall asleep and never wake up.  I have been told that freezing to death (once you get past the first stage) is a rather pleasant way to go because for whatever reason, your body thinks its funny to make you feel happy.  So, I decide even if I’m going to freeze to death, it will be an ok way to go.  I resign myself to this fate and continue the check in process at base, although I have no idea why anyone wants to get me “squared away” since I will be dead soon.  There are a lot of tears, because I know I didn’t want to be here, far away from my family, my boyfriend, warmth and civilization. I mean, if I’m going to die, I at least want to be able to get something nice to wear when I go, you know?  But all I have is a Walmart and all they have is a “Got Crabs” t-shirt.  Welcome to fishing HELL.

So, I get checked in, I get told a lot about bears and that it gets icy here (GASP!  It does?!  I never would have thought Alaska as being cold!).  But I didn’t know so much about these bears that will apparently come along and eat my body once I die from hypothermia.  Biggest brown bears in the world. There are 16 Kodiak bears per square mile up here.  So, even if I don’t die of cold, I am going to be eaten by a bear.  I have no idea why people like it here so much.

Once I get to my watch section and start to settle in, learn my way around, and get some food chocolate in my fridge, I start to feel better.  The rain let up and for the first time, I could see it was actually kinda pretty here.  It was 40 degrees, and I was already adjusting to the cold because it wasn’t so bad after about a week.  Maybe I wasn't going to die after all.  And there are definitely a lot of good photo taking opportunities. But I still had other problems to tackle – snow gear.

My First Winter - The backstory

So, here's the deal.  I am from Clermont, a smallish (well, its not so small anymore) town outside of Orlando, Florida.  Yes, the land of sunshine and Mickey Mouse.  I had been born and raised, gone to school, worked, gone to college all within a 50 mile radius.  My entire family lived in that circle too.  A couple years ago, I decided it would be a great idea to join the United States Coast Guard.  It took a while to get everything in order, but in January of 2011, I started my journey at bootcamp in Cape May, New Jersey.  Up until that point, I had seen snow twice.  I was too young to remember the first time, and the second time I was in NYC with my dad a month before I shipped out.  There were a couple of snow flurries while we were there.  This was the highlight of my winter experience.  Anything below 60 was cold, and I was going to bootcamp right after a legendary blizzard.  So began my journey with the white stuff.

In bootcamp, there was snow, oh yes.  But the trucks cleared it overnight and I never really got to experience it, because well, running outside and making a snow angel would be unsmart in such a setting. One time I did sneak around to the back of the barracks building and stick my hand in it.  HOLY COLD!  Then I scampered away back to formation where I pretended the stuff didn't exist.

When I graduated in March, I went to sunny California.  After school finished there, I was to go to my first permanent duty station, Kodiak, AK.  Where is Kodiak, you ask?  Well, its an island off of Alaska in the Gulf of Alaska, 150 miles or so south of Anchorage.  With 7,000 people.  The Walmart is the size of a Walgreen's in Orlando.  In Alaska.  Where it snows.  And it's cold.  And I had no idea what any of this meant.  I had the joy of getting here the day before my 23rd birthday, September 16th.  So I have to learn about this winter thing. And fast.

Let's recap. Cold. Island. Snow. Alaska. No real civilization. Yeah, this is going to be fun.